Should you Seek a Divorce or Stay Married

When a relationship begins to fail, it is one of the most difficult times of life, especially if children are involved.  Emotional trauma is hard for either partner to experience and divorce tends to be one of the most emotional traumas in life.  If you have been struggling with marital problems for long, you likely are wondering which way to go.  You may have the advice of friends and family, and often times this advice may seem to muddle your emotions even more.  When faced in this situation you must realize that there are certain considerations that you must also consider yourself in.  Not all relationships are good.  And, often times, it is best to consider yourself before you consider the partner or the marriage. 

If you are confused about how to handle your emotional conflicts you must first realize this is a normal feeling and one that many partners in relationships experience.  A failing marriage is often times a time of loneliness and isolation and emotional suffering that the other partner is not aware of because you have grown apart.  Hurt and rejection plays a significant role.  And communication, although the key, may not be there. 

Should your partner be physically abusive, there is no point in continuing the relationship.  It is a dangerous one and one that most often from not, you will never be able to overcome from.  Often times, these partners are willing to make promises that the abuse will never occur again just for one partner to return and once again be abused.  Physical abuse is a terrible situation for anyone to be in and one that a partner should escape from.  When a partner is abusive, love cannot always concur all.   

There are personal signs that partners experience when they are going through the trauma of a failing marriage or relationship such as: 

You can no longer sleep or relax

You can no longer stop thinking about thinking about  the failure of the relationship

You can no longer concentrate

You can not stop crying

You can not work

You can not control your fears

You can not control your anger

You can not control you kids 

Depression often sets in.  This is a common ailment in marriage.  Should you find yourself suddenly dependent on a crutch such as substance abuse or eating disorders this is a sure sign that you are suffering from emotional trauma and something must be done.  While there are many avenues there to help couples in this situation you must first analyze your relationship.  Be honest, look at the relationship, is it one that is destroying you or one that you can gain from.  You partner must be there also.  That is not to say, you cannot make time there, with loved shared, you can.   

A failing relationship is a difficult time of life.  If you find that you are becoming depressed, turning to the crutches of a supplement or drug such as alcohol, or you are turning away from life, then help is needed.  Counseling can help to overcome many of these emotions.  And, it can, if the other partner is concerned about the marriage as well, help to resolve the issues between you.

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